Sadistic Guardian Angel Won’t Let OC Man Just Die Already
[pullquote quote="I don't care how badly he wants to die. I'm in charge and I won't let him." credit="Guardian Angel"]
People like to say lightning doesn’t strike twice, but apparently trains do. An unidentified Irvine man fell off the platform and was struck by the Metrolink train two weeks ago and lived to tell about it. His Guardian Angel claims responsibility for the man’s miraculous recovery and lack of injuries.
For more keep reading after the jump.
He was again hit by a train on February 25th. He claims to have fallen off the platform in front of the train both times.
Initially, police cited the incident as an accident, but after the man’s second rumble with the tracks they’re investigating the situation further.
The 57-year-old man‘s identity is being withheld but his Guardian Angel released this statement:
It’s my job to save him and my job performance rate is exemplary. I don’t care how badly he wants to die. I’m in charge and I won’t let him. I’m not going to say it’s amusing watching him try to throw himself in front of a train twice and failing. But I will say I love my job.
If the man is found in front of the tracks for a third time in two weeks authorities can finally rule out the fact that it was merely an interesting coincidence. However, the man may be dead at that point. That’s logic.