“Heroes live forever, but legends never die…”
Well said, Babe Ruth from The Sandlot – we couldn’t have put it better ourselves.
In the wake of Osama Bin Laden’s death we’ve all been admiring the team that took him down: Seal Team Six. Those men are heroes of the highest order, but we’re not here to honor the great heroes of our time. We’re here to honor the legends, and there is one member of Seal Team Six around whom rumors are already beginning to turn to legend…
There were 80 commandos involved in the raid on Bin Laden’s compound. 79 men, and one highly trained, fearless four-legged friend with a perpetually wet nose.
A trained Navy SEAL Dog. Not to be confused with a seal dog.
The U.S. Government has been mum on all details surrounding the dog, they have refused to release his identity, and even his breed is being kept under wraps. We know practically nothing about this dog, except that IT IS THE COOLEST DOG EVER!
The Legend Dog flies through the air and shoots lasers from its eyes.
Legends began to circulate almost immediately after we learned of the pups existence. These days, dog bites are measured in psi (pounds per square inch) and the most powerful dog bite comes from the ~150 lb Mastiff who can bite with the force of more than 500 psi. That’s a pretty intense bite – 500 psi can crush metal and shatter bones no problem. The Legend Dog involved in the raid may not be a Mastiff, but we can safely say that it could bite with a greater force than 500 psi – how?
BECAUSE HE HAS TITANIUM TEETH. But this pup doesn’t stop there.
The Legend Dog was equipped with doggy BODY ARMOR, and it probably looked way cooler than when you see dogs wearing sweaters. The armor is made of Kevlar and is capable of repelling bullets, shrapnel, knife wounds and whatever else that jerk Bin Laden could throw at him.
Still not convinced this dog is legendary? Maybe a little afraid that with all this badass equipment the dog may go rogue or berserk? In the heat of battle things can get a little hairy, but don’t worry because the Legend Dog wears a headset with an attached infrared camera so that his masters (Seal Team Six) can radio him commands like ‘sit’, ‘roll over’ and probably more likely given the raid, ‘sick ‘im!’
We’ve also heard rumors of the Legend Dog being able to leap tall buildings and shoot lasers from his eyes, but a quick search through Google revealed no such schematics for us to report on…probably because the White House is trying to keep them all hush hush…well, we can’t really blame them for wanting to keep this secret weapon on the down low.