Whatever happened to the golden days when our food was held captive in pyramids?
What could this possibly mean!? Nothing too drastic, fortunately. Rather than sticking with 1992’s delicious and equilateral triangle of food, the U.S. Department of Agriculture has dumbed-down America’s portion into an easy-to-read, Simon-esque paper plate of provisions.
Looks like we need more fruits and veggies (at least half a plate), considerably less “protein” (formally meat), and a bright blue place mat on which to eat our meals.
This blows. Does the government know long it took us to scale the old food pyramid?! There was candy at the top of that mountain!