Jack’s Sixth Show is coming September 10th. And oh yes, there will be blood.. wait, I mean beer. There will be beer. But what kind? Here are the six beers I hope to see at Jack’s Sixth Show.
6. Colt 45
Make no mistake about it, Colt 45 is utterly awful. It kinda tastes like battery acid flavored with rancid grape Kool Aid, if Kool Aid can go rancid. So why does it get this spot? Simple- Billy Dee Williams.
Is Billy Dee Williams most famous for his role as Lando Calrissian? No. It’s for being the spokesman for Colt 45. So that’s why Colt makes the list.
5. Dos Equis
Well, Colt 45 makes the list for Billy Dee, Dos Equis makes it for The Most Interesting Man in the World. Dos Equis is actually drinkable! So it comes it at number 5.
(Incidentally, The Most Interesting Man in the World and Billy Dee Williams were numbers 7 and 8 on the Top 6 list of people we’d like to see in the audience of Jack’s Sxith Show.)
Hite is by far my favorite Korean Beer. It’s clean, crisp and fresh, and powered by the FTK (that’s the Fresh Taste Keeping System). Plus, in South Korea, they have fire trucks full of Hite ready to spray down hot and thirsty crowds at a moments notice.
YEAH!!! We need some sort of authentic Milwaukee brew at the show, right? And since Pabst has been commandeered by The Hipster (the dreaded vermin of society), I’m sticking with Schlitz. But don’t trust me, trust [lastfm link_type=”similar_artist_radio”]Lionel Richie[/lastfm] and the Commodores!
This beer is INSANE. It is usually the first beer that I go for when hitting up the Yard House. But really, YOU DON’T NEED MORE THAN ONE! Switch to something lighter after your first Piraat.
It clocks in at 10.5% alcohol by volume, or, as my friend so eloquently put it, “It will f*** you up!” You can learn more about Piraat (as I did) by checking out this maniac from the Global Beer Network (mental note- apply for a job with the Global Beer Network)
Well, DUH. Of course Coors has to come in at Number 1; They’re the official sponsor of Jack’s Sixth Show, and this is a business.
But Coors still earned its way onto this list. First, it’s Banquet Beer. And I can’t think of a bigger banquet than Jack’s Sixth Show.
And of all the beers on this list, Coors is a celebrity. It co-starred with Burt Reynolds in Smokey and the Bandit. And being a celebrity ALWAYS gets you to the top of the list.