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5 Reasons We Should All Have X Ray Tech Powers

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Joe Raedle / Newsmakers

Joe Raedle / Newsmakers

The first reason most people suggest we should have x-ray tech super powers is as obsolete as it is obvious. For years millions of young boys wasted their allowances and imaginations on ridiculous “X ray specs”, which worked entirely by making things fuzzy and customers too ashamed to complain.

It was a true tragedy, because a teen boy’s imagination is more than capable of generating what he wants to see when it isn’t being distracted by overpriced pieces of cardboard.

But in the age of the Internet, using x ray tech superpowers to see through clothing is a worse idea than setting fire to your own hands to save money for gloves. A vast computer network will offer you all the unclothed other people you could ever need, and real x ray tech vision would only excite someone who had a kink for mummies.

No, the real reasons people should have x ray tech super powers are:

1. Regular health checks

x ray 2 5 Reasons We Should All Have X Ray Tech Powers

Jewish Hospital / Getty Images

X ray machines are incredibly useful diagnostic tools. The massive majority of medical problems are easy to fix as long as you find them early enough, but an x ray machine isn’t something you can just stroll through on your way to work.

The ability to see inside yourself and other people will provide constant updates on any unusual masses or unwanted bunchings of material, allowing you to get medical treatment early.


2. Weight control

Nothing reveals obesity like an x ray.

You might think seeing through the flesh would make it easier to pack on pounds without feeling guilt, but being constantly faced with the scale of the body you’re supposed to have is powerful psychological programming.

Especially as you see the bones bend and thicken under the ever-increasing load. The skeleton is a real load-bearing structure, and when that load gets too much the results aren’t pretty.

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