5 May Flowers That Will Straight Up Kill You
Alright so April showers have finally passed us (maybe?) which according to the old saying will bring us some mighty fine May flowers.
This is great and all, but there are some flowers out there that will kill you dead without even thinking twice about it.
Vengeful, evil flowers, and it turns out (much like many women out there) the prettiest ones are usually the deadliest.
To protect our loyal and dedicated listeners from the wrath of these sweet smelling beasts, we have put together a list of 5 flowers that could be growing in YOUR back yard that are poisonous!
1. Lily of the Nile – Oh yes, we know ALL about these purple pests. They look all lavender and pretty, but they are poisonous and must be stopped. Ok the truth is that they are really only poisonous if you eat them (so hide your cats, hide your dogs…) but they are still murderous beasts and can’t be trusted.
2. Pasque Flower – Another purple people eater! But this one looks like something you’d put on a prom corsage. This one can irritate your skin so maybe keep it away from your prom date if you want to smooch em at the end of the night. If ingested in high quantities (why are we eating flowers anyway?!?!) it can make you poop your pants. Yeah, we said it. It will straight up make you doo-doo in your pantalones.
3.Elephant Ear – Appropriately named, considering these things are of mammoth sized proportions, this plant will make you vomit. Again, if for some reason you are drawn to eating random plants you see on the side of the PCH, please refrain from eating this. While it does make you think of fried dough options at the LA County Fair, this is NOT the powdered sugar covered delight you think it is.
4. California Poppy – You read that correctly. Our STATE FLOWER is poisonous. We don’t even know what to say about this one. Well done California, well done.
5. Foxglove – These gorgeous looking plants have pollen that when inhaled can totally send you to the emergency room. COME ON MOTHER NATURE. Give us a friggin break.
Alright, so a lot of these may not KILL YOU per say, but they are definitely not to be trusted.
– Sasha Huff, 93.1 JACK FM