‘El Wingador’ Wing Eating Champion Arrested On Cocaine Distribution
There are probably many things a wing-eating champion can do, that the rest of us cannot. To earn a title such as “El Wingador“, one must undergo immense dedication and training…or be born with it.
Drug dealing on the other hand probably takes less brain power than shoving carnivorous products down your throat at the speed of lightning, while it piles up in your small intestine.
Five-time wing eating champion William ‘El Wingador‘ Simmons, is currently under arrest in New Jersey on a charge of cocaine distribution. We knew there had to be some white, powdery influence on his ability to eat that many wings.
Fifty-year-old El Wingador was stopped by police on Friday in southern New Jersey, while driving a Kia Soul, pimped out with the name “El Wingador“. Get used to that word we’re going to say it as many times as possible in this article. That’s right.
El Wingador’s most recent victory was Philadelphia’s Wing Bowl in 2005, at which he devoured 126 chicken wings. Git-R-Done! Currently drawing thousands of fans each year, Wing Bowl allowed Philadelphia sports fans to relieve some adrenaline before the Super Bowl.
State police discovered $8,000 worth of cocaine and $4,000 cash in El Wingador’s, El Wingador-mobile. After searching two homes connected to El Wingador, in Woodbury Heights, N.J., more chicken wing stained evidence appeared.
William ‘El Wingador‘ Simmons is being held on $100,000 bond. Bond can also be payed in chicken wings…just kidding.