Plan to shoplift lingerie: check.
Stroll around store naked: check
Use a blonde wig and red dress as a disguise: check.
Cover up identifying tattoo on your back bearing your last name: uh, well…
Good job Jose PERALES. According to the Huffington Post, Police in Davenport, Iowa arrested Perales and charged him with 3rd degree burglary, 3rd degree theft, and 1st degree stupidity after he broke into Dr. John’s Lingerie Boutique and strolled around the store naked. After Perales finished his late night shopping, he walked into the manager’s office and changed into his disguise of stolen merchandise, then promptly left the store.
Unfortunately for Perales, while he was walking around naked, security cameras captured images of his back, which has his last name tattooed in Old English letters. Police were able to identify Perales and, after they were done laughing, promptly arrested him. We’ve been told, however, that Perales will not charged with 1st degree stupidity after all.
– Carlos Delgado, CBS Radio