Kim Kardashian

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Think about it this way Reggie, if that relationship would have continued, you'd be marrying a hooker today.

Kim Kardashian

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Wonder what color Kim Kardaschians wedding dress is gonna be Saturday? Cause we all know white would be a lie.

Kim Kardashian

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Kim Kardashian's wedding is before Labor Day, so technically she can get away with wearing white.

Kim Kardashian

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Think anybody took Ray J as their plus 1 to the Kim Kardaschian wedding? Cause man, talk about awkward.

Kim Kardashian

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Man, who would have thought that Kim Kardashian would get married somewhere other than Vegas at 2am?

Kim Kardashian

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So, do you think Kim Kardashian is about ready to have an extramarital affair yet?...you think by Tuesday, then?

Kim Kardashian

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Stupid U.S. Mail. They lost JACK FM's invite to the Kardashian wedding.

Kim Kardashian

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Still kinda miffed we didnt get an invite to the Kardaschian wedding this weekend. Wuddup Bruce? Thought we were tight?

Kim Kardashian

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Who wants to crash the Kardashian wedding with JACK FM? C'mon, it'll be fun!

Kim Kardashian

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Wouldn't it be weird if Kim Kardashian marries Lamar Odom as well?

Kim Kardashian

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Sure hope someone thinks to bring a camera to the Kardashian wedding.

Kim Kardashian

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So, what's the over/under on the Kardashian divorce? (866) 931-JACK

Kim Kardashian

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When you were watching the OJ trial back in the 90's, did you ever think that one of his lawyer's skanky daughters would be getting married this weekend?

Kim Kardashian

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Wait, if all the Kardaschians are at Kim's wedding right now then that means nobody is at their house right?....See you in Calabasas in 10 minutes.